Nadiah Alwi

As we all know, Ramadhan means you have to manage your emotion, including your anger.

Yet, since breaking my fasting this evening, there had been 2 stuff that drove me mad.

The first one, I dealt with it by phone. The second one, on the net.

Both are repetition. That’s why I got very angry about them. They could actually have been prevented. Both persons could have done them right. Yet, they just didn’t. Out of ignorance.

According to a friend to whom I talked about it earlier, what happened was simply a test for me in this holy month. Have I been able to manage my emotion?

I don’t think I was 100% failed the test. I did state my concern over the problem. Yet, I did it quite politely.

You don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone. Know that lyric? I do and I think it’s absolutely right.

People take for granted everything they have but then when it’s gone, they start missing it.

I think, that’s what happened with me and the King. I mean, well, he was there in his Neverland, safe, alive, maybe he could make more musics and all. But then, I saw on TV, he passed away.

I was ok at first. So what if he’s gone?

Then, I heard his songs played again and again on the radio. Umm…is he really gone? I asked myself.

Oh no, the King of Pop is no longer with us. He can’t make more musics. Then, I realized that something was missing.

I visited his website. You can post your bestest memory about the king there.

I have quite a lot memory — not that I met him or what — about his songs. They have accompanied me during some moments of sorrow and joy, when I was sad and even when I fell in love.

Well, thanks, MJ. Your beautiful voice, your wonderful songs, will always be there for me though you can’t now. May you rest in peace, Sir.

Just now, I met my Dad, a man of almost 63 years old with his past long experience as an employee.

While me, I’m a work at home mom. For the time being, I’m not planning to go back working at the office after being sent home last February because the company was in crisis.

And, you know what he asked me?

“Don’t you apply again?”

I was silent for a few seconds. Then, I answered, “No.”

“Why?”

“If I do apply and get hired again, I can’t take other jobs the way I do now.”

Currently I work for someone, building an online store. I only work from Monday to Wednesday, 9 to 5, from home. So, Thursday to Sunday, I can take other jobs — mostly translating.

My Dad was speechless. He knows that when I made my decision, no one can change that but me.

So, hopefully, my plan works, so he doesn’t ask again. I know he was only being a caring Dad.

And, I went to an exhibition today. I learned that by being creative you can survive. You don’t have to work for other people. I love the idea.

Hope I can be THAT creative.

Many bloggers write posts on this case. Thousands of people joined a Facebook cause. A mother of two was jailed for a “defamatory” e-mail she sent out about the standard of care in an exclusive Tangerang hospital.

You can read the whole story at the Jakarta Globe, a daily English language newspaper in Indonesia.

It’s only 1 day away from my birthday. My 32nd now.

I don’t know how I should see this birthday. I don’t even know what to do on that particular day. Should I hold a party — a small one, only family included? Or, should I simply give myself a me-time? Or, I’ll just let it go by?

Well, I have prepared some kind of a celebration at my online store. And, I guess my online life would be pretty hectic that day — thanks to facebook.

Yet, I’m talking about my offline life — I can’t say ‘real’ life ‘coz anyhow my online life is in a way as real or even more real than my offline life.

I was thinking about having this contemplation time just like th eold time when I was early 20. However, at that time, I was comtemplating about what would I become.

Now,  I don’t know yet what I would become. But, I’m not searching anymore.

Well, let’s see if I can think of something excited for me to do on that special day. I doubt it though. I have a feeling it will just go by, it will just be the same as other ordinary days. So what if it is?