House or Home?
What I love with English is it has two different terms one can use to define a place where he/she lives in. Why is it so important for me? Because, I feel like now I live in a house which I cannot call home. And, for me, that is quite sad. Because, previously, I did call it home.
I used to live here since I was three days young up to one week after my marriege which was when I was 26 years old. After the marriage, I rent a house. But then, about two years later, I had to go back to this house for some reasons.
And, now, after almost four years living here again, I feel like there is such a big gap between me and this house. We both, in a certain way, distance ourselves from each other.
Me with my big desire to have a house of my own, and the house itself with its different proprietor.
Actually, there are many things that make me sad about living here. One of them is how this house reminds me a lot of my late beloved grandparents. Yes, it was their home, with me in it. Now that they are gone and this house providing various memories on each of its corners, the comfot I used to feel has gone.
I also have this big dream of my own house. A big dream of a small comfy house. I don’t need a big one, because I know I have only little time and energy to clean up the whole house. And, I also want it to be warm. It’s not that big house cannot provide warmness. It can, but with lots of members of family living in it. I wish to have it with my small nuclear family, consisting of not more than 4 persons, hubby, me, my daughter, and maybe my second child.
I don’t know how, but I still hope and pray that one day, this beautiful dream will come true. With the love of Allah, insya Allah, I will have a place that I can call home — again.
Tell me, do you have a facebook account? Do you tweet? Or, own a blog?
Hm…I myself even found it hard to explain — you should see how confused I get with this ALONE explanation on the next paragraphs. LOL.
Happy fasting everyone!
Frankly speaking, this is not my first, yet I can’t tell you how many teeth had gone out of my mouth though. Yes, I’ve just got my tooth taken!